Elle by Latifah Al Jasser

Posted on October 15, 2012 by

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Who is Elle? Learn a little bit about her here.

 

 “I get called ‘bitch’ five times a day, it’s in the job description” with that sentence, which happens to be the first sentence I said to my therapist, my ramble started. My therapist gave me a look that screamed ‘oh-wow-another-lunatic’ and I began introducing myself to Doctor… umm well that’s epic! I forgot my therapist’s name already!

 

“Hello, we didn’t get off with a good start. My name is Elle, and no it’s not short for anything; my parents were simply too lazy to give me a real name. I work as a tattooist.” Doctor what’s-his-name said, “Well, Elle, why do you work as a tattooist?” He asked his tone bored as if he already knows the answer, I’m sure my answer will wipe the look off his old face.”I took after my parents.” I stated simply, and I kept on staring at his face. “Care to elaborate any further, miss?” “Are you sure you want to go there?” I seriously hoped he knew what he’s doing if he’s answering with a yes. “Yes, I do.” “Okay, but don’t say I didn’t warn you. I babble a lot so good luck in shutting me up. You see my parents left me their tattoo parlour , that’s its name too. I just realised that my parents are very lazy when it comes to naming things first the shop and then me. Anyway where was I? Oh yeah, so I was expected to work in it when they passed away. I was very sad I actually wanted to finish college since I loved my major, but you don’t always get what you want.” He looked shocked, what he never heard of an educated tattooist? I was very tempted to start using those long SAT words I memorised and never got to use, but I decided not to since I’m already on his bad side. “How does dropping out of college affect your life, in your opinion?” Is he serious? If he is then I’m seriously thinking about hitting his head with this heavy chair. “How does dropping out of college affect my life? Gee, I don’t know, how do you think it affects my life? You’re a freaking therapist! You should know the consequences of not having a bachelor degree!” I all but screamed at him.

 

After a full 5 minutes of silence.

 

“Well, maybe you should add anger management to the list of things I need.” I stated sheepishly, and he gave me a pointed look. “Dr.Wrinkles! That’s your name!” There I go again with my embarrassing outbursts. “Excuse me?! My name is Dr.Winkel not Wrinkles! And you already forgot my name?” He said, with his eyes wide. “Okay okay, just keep your eyes in their sockets so they don’t pop out.” I said with my arms in a surrendering pose. “What is holding you back from continuing your education? And before you think that I am stupid I am asking that question because something tells me that there is more to it than what your letting on.” “You’re right there is more to than what I am letting on but let us keep that until our next session, what do you say?”

 

After a whole hour of listening to Dr.Winkel go on and on about how I should lessen my hatred towards mankind, and how me being a misanthropist which I’m totally not is influencing my acceptance of life and all that crap, I went home. When I entered my apartment as usual loneliness struck, and my smile dropped. It is so quiet and lifeless in there. I remembered how last week I was thinking about buying a pet, fill the void that I feel. Then this baby thing happened, and the pet idea flew very far from my mind.

 

What should I do? The thoughts were running inside my head fleeing from one direction to the other. Should I give it up? Or should I keep it? Will I love it enough? Will I be good to it? Will I do justice by it? Or will it have a better life somewhere else with someone else? The rational part of me was saying that I should give it up because I’ll never be a good mo- … I can’t even say the word from how much it terrifies me. The irrational part of me, which is the bigger part, is saying that if I give it up I’ll regret this choice for the rest of my life. Mental note: maybe I should stop referring to my unborn child as an”it”. I looked up at the ceiling I screamed “why would you do that to me?! I’m only 18!”

 

As I was getting out of the apartment building I bumped into a tall guy who had an adorable smile with a cute dimple, but since I am a pregnant lady and it almost 60 degrees here in this heat, I didn’t really care about his looks. Pissed off I yelled,”will you watch where you’re going? You almost knocked me off the road!” What terrified me more is that the thought of me falling and endangering my baby made my heart drop, maybe I am more of a mother than I thought. “Here let me carry  your stuff for you, to make it up to you.” Cutie said smiling, I almost caved. Dammit! Hormones already? “I’m Max. You are?” He asked, I couldn’t leave him hanging especially with that dimple. “I’m Elle.” I could already feel my world turning after that sentence.

 

 

7 years later, here I am sitting on my desk writing an ending to my autobiography. Which reminds me it’s been a long time since I’ve last been to see Dr.Winkels, maybe I should stop by and say hi on my way to work? That sounds like a pleasant idea. Also, I should stop by the shop. A familiar dimple invaded my daydreams “honey, I told you get off the computer already, or me and Eva will leave without you! Right princess?” My husband stated looking at my 6 year old daughter. “Of course daddy.” She replied while smiling over at her father. “I’m done I swear, I just needed to finish writing the ending of my book, but I got distracted thinking about visiting Dr.Winkels.” I said while closing the laptop screen and getting my coat.

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