Skin by Mimi

Posted on February 11, 2013 by

0


You came with guards down and I’m ashamed to say,

I took advantage of that.

 

“this is what it must be like, living in the mind of a maniac.”

 

I could swear by the stars in your eyes,

That even I, having sold my soul to words

Or the devil, I don’t quite remember

Still cannot explain you

You are beyond my capacity of description

 

I just want to tell you to fuck off and let me be

And also tell you to hold me closer and never let go

Yes, I am fucked up

But I managed to love.

Yes I am soaked with flaws

Yes I am bleeding through old scars

But there is nothing underneath this skin,

That will tear you off of it

You stick to every inch of me,

Like ink

Like an old tattoo refusing to fade away

 

I’m puzzled by how the sharp end of a knife, has a striking resemblance to my pen.

How at ease it is with my fingers

 

I’m startled by the amount of peace I feel,

while I create my own version of you.

The version I liked the most.

Before all the lying and all the hatred,

before your face turned an unappealing shade of grey.

 

Now I can trim you down and stitch you up whichever way I prefer,

Like I do a poem.

This makes me feel, godly.

 

And I won’t call myself a poet,

Nor a painter.

I’m just overflowing with things that seem to find solace in paper and canvas.

 

You said,

 

“just let it out so it doesn’t make a home out of you.”

 

and I took that to heart.

 

They can say I did this because I’m crazy,

That I managed to bang my head on a few walls

But they won’t know the real reasons,

It’s because I am selfish,

It’s because no one else can have you.

Its because your blood felt like paint on my fingers.

Its because it felt good.

 

And through you,

I created my masterpiece

 

I won’t apologize for that..

Even if they call me empty, ugly, and a heartless pig

You once called me beautiful.

And loving.

And full of soul.

That is all that matters now.

 

When these flashing lights and inquisitive faces stare at me,

Bombarding me with questions

I state: I have no regrets

Except for one,

They took you away from me.

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