Confession by Meera

Friday the 9th, 12:00 am

 

I can’t get you out of my mind.

I can’t just keep you as a friend.

I can’t stop picturing you in bed.

And I can’t imagine you can’t be mine.

 

Every time I see you my heart skips its beat.

To be honest I wish I could just breathe…

Our friendship means everything to me.

You are my everything.

Yet I can’t have your everything to myself.

 

Why, why do I feel this? Why do I love you the way you never did?

Tell me what is wrong with me… What can’t you find in me?

Don’t I reach your standards or is it because we are friends?

Why can’t you see how much I love you, how much I want you,

how much I need you beyond being a friend.

Keeping this to my self is just killing.

 

Seeing others flirting with you scorches me.

I think my jealousy is wrapped up in my own pride I think my affections are perfectly fine.

I don’t want you to have the idea that I am falling madly in love with you for one reason

that I don’t want what I have to change I can’t afford losing you.

I am afraid of what my confession will destroy.

 

Today you looked beautiful in a way that I was so close to confess.

Then some douchebag came and asked you for a dance.

 

I held this secret for too long now.

Affections unuttered as to

Avoid the coming clutter of our simple, beautiful, unexplained friendship.

I want to look into your eyes and tell you:

 

I love you.

Yes! I love you as a friend.

But no, I love you as my secret lover.

 

 

 

Friday the 9th, 10:00 am

 

This is the last letter written by my best friend…

I wish I had confessed my love to him too.

I love you.

Rest in peace.